Reading PennsylvaniaCity of Reading, Pennsylvania

Screwball Parker

Screwball Parker

We love Screwball’s crazy antics when he’s on the field at the Reading Fightin Phils stadium, but we’ve heard his parking needs a little work! Unfortunately, Screwball’s not the only bad parker in Reading. Our officers see some pretty off-the-wall parking when they’re on the streets, too. Just look at some of the Screwball Parkers we come across:

Reading, PA Code of Ordinances
Parking ordinances begin with Chapter 576 (Vehicles and Traffic) Part 4 (Stopping and Parking)

“Well, at least they didn’t block the garage. There really is always a silver lining if you look for it. Really hard. And it’s a little tiny silver lining, but it’s there.”

Seriously…don’t park like a Screwball.

“Bet they didn’t color inside the lines in pre-school either. But the stakes are a little higher for grown-ups—nicks and dings in the enamel, parking fines, Road Rage. You never know what kind of day the ‘the other guy’ is having or how they’re going to react, so please…don’t park like a Screwball.”

SUV double parking

“This SUV was double parked next to an open space. Yep, we mean parked…turned off with no one inside. For 5 minutes. No one unloading groceries. Or helping their grandma to the car. With cars behind it and oncoming traffic, it’s easy to see how this could go very wrong. So please…Don’t park like Screwball.”

UPS Truck blocking loading zone

We know delivery drivers are especially busy at this time of year, and we’re thankful for their hard work. But this driver tried to save time by parking directly across the street from an open loading zone space. This photo is from the 600 block of Penn Street. Not only is Penn Street one of the busiest streets in Reading, but if you drive in the city, you probably already know this is the narrowest block on the entire street. If you look closely, you can see the truck’s driver-side wheels are almost on the double yellow lines. That means this truck blocked the entire eastbound lane,
causing a traffic back-up and a lot of honking horns from frustrated drivers stuck behind it. EVEN WORSE, those drivers crossed into the lane of oncoming traffic to pass the truck, which is dangerous for other drivers AND pedestrians.

Double parking is not only inconvenient for other drivers, but it’s hazardous and can lead to accidents. So please…don’t drive like a Screwball.

FYI – Because this truck was left unoccupied, it would have been ticketed if one of our enforcement officers had come across it. Our standard operating procedures (SOP) allow a grace period if a driver is actively loading and unloading their vehicle, assisting someone into or out of the car, etc. and there is no other space available on the block. But unoccupied vehicles, vehicles that are turned off, and vehicles double-parked when another space is open are automatically ticketed.

Screwball Parker Example

“But officer, only my front tires are in the yellow…”

Usually when someone says this, they’re trying to say just a little bit of their car is next to yellow curb, but most of it is in a legal on-street parking space next to unpainted curb. They figure the car is parked just a little bit illegally.

Unfortunately this parker got it backwards. Just a little bit of their car is next to the yellow curb, but most of it isn’t parked next to any curb at all. This car is parked a whole lot illegally. Like entirely illegally.

Parking within an intersection is a hazard violation because it blockers other drivers’ and pedestrians’ view as they try to safely enter the intersection. It can cause serious accidents and injuries. So please…Don’t park like a Screwball!

Screwball Parker Example

This car is parked way too close to the corner at a yellow curb. AND it’s parked about 2 ½ feet out from the curb. Either of these violations makes it extremely hard for first responders to maneuver their rigs down the street during emergencies, and combined they’re an even bigger problem. Did you know RFD’s largest vehicle is approximately 47 feet long and 9 feet wide?

These parking violations could be a matter of life and death. So please…Don’t park like a Screwball!

BTW, the cone in these photos appears to be an innocent victim. However, no cones were injured in the taking of these photographs

Dear Amazon,

We’re always excited to see your smiling packages waiting for us when we get home. But when a street is so narrow only one side has parking and there’s just one drive lane, please don’t stop your truck in the drive lane—the ONLY drive lane. Especially right next to open, legal parking spaces on the PARKING side of the street. Drivers in other vehicles have places to go while you’re off delivering boxes of Amazon happiness, so please…don’t park like a Screwball.


White Truck Screwball Parker

Our officers see some pretty off-the-wall parking when they’re on the streets. Just look at this vehicle below.

Did you know the average weight of a standard pick-up truck is over 4,000 lbs? That’s two TONS! And extended cab trucks usually weigh even more. We’ll spare you the specifics of sidewalk construction and their many layers, but suffice it to say parking on one can lead to extensive—and expensive!—damage.

But even more important is the danger it causes pedestrians when they’re forced into the street because a sidewalk is completely blocked. (Remember, this particular sidewalk is wider than average!) So let’s keep everyone safe, our sidewalks in good shape, and please…don’t park like a Screwball!

Firetruck screwball parker

We have safe parking just 10 feet from where these cars are, and we will validate parking for anyone who parks in our South Penn Garage next door while they are in the office. So please…don’t park like a Screwball.

White Honda Screwball Parker

Word on the street has it this car was “parked” just like you see it here. We don’t mean double parked. Nope. Really “parked.” Engine turned off—Check! Driver in the store—Check! But with all that space to just cruise right in, it would be GREAT to park in a real space. You know, not in the lane of traffic. Unless there’s a national chip shortage we’re not aware of, the snacks will still be there even after the 10 extra seconds it takes to actually park. So please…don’t park like a Screwball.

Screwball Parker at Parking Garage

This is not a compact car parking space. It has never been a compact car parking space in the past. It will never be a compact car parking space in the future. We repeat, this is NOT a compact car parking space. There’s really not too much more to say about this one except…please, don’t park like a Screwball.